September 24th

Posted: September 24, 2012 in bucket list, Comedy, Diet, exercise, Inspiration, Motivation, Uncategorized, vegan, weight loss, Will Power

I had a banana. I played noon hoops. I came home. I worked out. I am currently listening to a mashup of Carly Rae Jepson (that’s my spelling of her name) and PSY. It’s life changing.

This is getting really boring. I don’t have anything to talk about. I’m going to go watch Breaking Bad and have a decent post for tomorrow. Also, the reason my “go fly a kite” video isn’t up is that the flash drive on which that was stored on was ALSO stolen out of my car. Stolen shit is just piling up.

I live in LaPorte. It’s a small town. The thought of roaming bandits stealing my shit is less and less likely. Basically, the kid that lives across the street from me has asshole friends that stole my shit. I have no way to prove this. I have no recourse. I just have to sit here with that knowledge and do nothing. It’s frustrating. What I want to do is walk over there with my gun and hold it against his temple and make him piss himself until he tells me which one of his crack head friends stole my shit.

Unfortunately, this isn’t 1846.

If I were to call the police and say that “I have a hunch that this dickface across the street stole my stuff”, what could they say?

Officer: Sir did you see the individual in question steal your property?

Me: No sir.

Officer: Unfortunately, we can’t do shit.

Me: Cool.

It’s just very frustrating.

I guess I did what I could do…I bought new garage doors, and motion lights. I’ll park my vehicle inside my new fortress of a garage, and then maybe I’ll be ok.

That does not change the fact that:

I might just start a fund for the lone person that is awesome enough to just take revenge on people they know are criminal.

If you want to be a paid vigilante…contact me. I promise I can raise money to pay you…and then have no involvement in your vigilante-ness 🙂



  1. nicole says:

    gran tornio those bitches!

  2. paranoia paranoia
    everybody’s coming to get me
    just say you never met me
    i’m going underground with the moles

    It’s the Barb song, Ben. You’re living the Barb song.

    Why are you letting this occupy a part of your brain. Unless you see them with your stuff, you have no proof that they did it. Of course they probably did, but you have bigger things to take care of now. Wait ’til your’re 70 and have time to go all Gran Torino!

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