So there is a guy that has a blog. His blog is about his random ramblings and rantings. I do not know this man. He decided to include me in a list of nominations for an award for blogging. This is his site: http://shittalkinnick.com
He and I share a love of boobies: http://shittalkinnick.com/2012/12/19/nipple-me-this
When I saw the link pop up on my stats page I didn’t really know what was going on, and then I read his page and sure enough, he wrote me right in there. So thanks Mr. Nick….if that is your real name. Also, BOOBIES!
That makes your Friday just all the more better right there. Plus I got a phone call from my very good friend Alyssa all the way out there in Boston, and we’re finalizing details for me to fly out there in April to hang with her and her husband and daughter.
Plus I sold 4 jobs today.
Plus I ate perfectly healthy today.
THIS FRIDAY IS AWESOME.
I saw a man pushing a tire down the road in Michigan today. I stopped and asked him if he would like a ride. Turns out he was literally walking a spare tire from his buddy’s house to his car on the highway. FOUR MILES down the road. He was very appreciative of the ride and told me that he would pay it forward by tipping the girl at the strip club extra tonight. I don’t think he was kidding.
Random story time!
I met a man today who knew my great uncle Ben (yes, I’m his namesake), and he asked me about the different properties that Ben owned around town. He said, “That’s one thing about Ben, when it came to dollars and cents, it was hard to get ahead of him.”
So my uncle was gooder with money than me. Probably English too. Whatever.
I think my New Years resolution this year is going to involve my budget. I’d really like to remodel my bathroom, but I spend money on things like booze, food, travel, movies, prostitutes, and meth. I’ve really gotta cut out that food.
As this year draws to a close, I tried to think back at all of the things that I attempted and what really stuck. I’m not going to bore you with the big list of failures…and trust me there are SOOOOO many.
What I am going to do is list the permanent changes that I’ve made for the better. I quit chewing tobacco in 2012. I quit drinking caffeine in 2012. I changed the way that I look at volunteering/RAOKs (as in, I do both of them a LOT more). I made a bucket list and crossed 1/2 of it off.
Let’s call that 4 new years resolutions that stuck out of I don’t know…30 or so that I tried?
You could say that I failed 26 times, or you could say that I changed my life completely FOUR times this year. I think the second one sounds better. Actually the only way that the second one could sound any better is if Sean Connery was reading it: “Or you could shay that I changed my lyfe completely FOWR tymes thisear” #conneryvoice
Oh OH! Or maybe if James Earl Jones was reading it: “Or you could say that I changed my life completely FOUR times this year.” #dontberacist
Anyway, I’m really happy with 2012. I’m going to be REALLY happy in January when I get to stop all this nonsense again. The holidays were a nice little break from a few of my obligations, but I’ll tell you what, it just makes it THAT much harder to get back into it.
Now that I’m letting my legs rest up a little bit, I’ve definitely got more time to juggle! That might be the saddest sentence I’ve ever written. The exclamation point sealed it. How am I excited about that? Seriously, dude, WTF?
I’m thankful for this amazing computer I got for Christmas. It’s friggin sweet. It has a 15″ screen and the picture is so clear it’s like some kind of metaphor that really explains how clear it is. I like it more than most boobs, and some Bacon.
I’ve been checking into Florida deals on various websites, I really like http://www.travelzoo.com. If anyone else has good sites that have decent deals on resorts and whatnot in Florida, I’d be interested to hear. If you have a jewish grandparent living in Florda (and who doesn’t), I would like to stay on their couch.
I hope your Holiday season is going pretty darn well, I know mine is. It’s Friday night and I’m about to PARTY HARD.*
- I will keep a blog of my activities everyday. missed 2
- I will go for a jog of at least one mile or a swim, every morning. missed 3
- I will drink only water. Christmas did me in…so 2 days I did not fulfill this obligation
- I will only eat things that myself or my friends/family have prepared. FAIL! I ATE BDUBS ONCE and Subway!
- I will not eat BACON. Success – I ate something I didn’t know had Bacon in it until I was eating it!
- I will exercise twice a day BESIDES THE JOG (30 minutes at least) missed a few here and there
- I will not ingest caffeine. Success
- I will abstain from sex/self-love/prostitutes/your mom Success
- I will perform one random act of kindness every day. Success
- I will wake up at 5am everyday except Sunday and Christmas Day…yeah, I added that one.. missed 5
- I will not watch any form of television/film (tv/movies/netflix) The only exception being one viewing of “A Christmas Story” while I stay the night at my parents’ house, and one movie in the theatre on Christmas with my family because that’s tradition and screw you this is my thing. Successfullish – SNL/Jack Reacher has been added as a nice reward for being awesome/watched movies with my family over Christmas
- I will not log into Facebook after Dec 4th. Success
- I will complete one project around the house per week. Success
- I will give thanks for something in my life every morning and record it on the blog every night. Forgot to blog few days
- I will read one book every week. Book one: Minority Report, Book two: Oh, The things I know, Book three: 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.
- I will not bite my fingernails. I chewed them all off during Jack Reacher without even thinking about it. DANGIT. AND THEN at DJANGO! SHOOT!
- I will not use my cell phone after Dec. 4th. Success, calls are now allowed, see December 15th)
- I will not visit any websites other than wordpress, email, thechive.com, and google images to give me funny pictures for my blog. (Also Travel websites are allowed for #22) Success
- I will do whatever I need to do to squat 250 pounds. Success
- I will spend the necessary time playing the trumpet to learn one entire song. Pending
- I will spend the necessary time juggling 4 bean bags to learn to juggle four bean bags. Pending
- I will finalize my plans to go to Florida in 2013. Pending
- I won’t say a swear word, not one. Day 1: approx 12, Day 2: approx 5, Day 3: approx 2, Day 4: approx 2, Day 5: approx 6, Day 6: 2 exactly Day 7: approx 4, Day 8: I think zero. Day 9: back up to like 4. Day 10 approx 5 or 6. Day 11 approx 4. Day 12: 3 exactly Day 13: 2? maybe 3? Day 14: I think zero!? Day 15: A BIG ONE and like 2 more. Day 16: a couple here and there Day 17: like 4? Day 18: I caught myself much more often BEFORE I said them today, so I had like 2 or 3 slip out I think. Day 19: around 4. Day 20: I’m not actually sure…5? Day 21, I maybe swore a few times on Christmas which is probably the worst day all year to swear, well maybe Mother’s day would top it…Day 22: I don’t really remember, I know it was only a couple though. Day 23: like ONE. Good job dude. Day 24: I said ass. That’s it.
*Partying hard will consist of reading a bit of a book, doing a crossword puzzle, watching Larry pee at some point, and going to bed early. Stop being so jealous, it’s a terrible attribute you have.