Archive for February, 2013


I show up at work at 7:30.

Making that face.


I will never be that guy that friggin LOVES to come in early in the morning to get stuff done. It’s just not my nature. Never will be. I get plenty done during the day, I swear, but my thought is never, “EY!!!! i should go to that place early and get more done so that I can leave earlier”.

Do you know why?

If you normally show up at 8am and work til 5pm, but one day you decide to show up at 7am to get “more stuff done”, you will STILL stay until 5pm. You will not leave at 4pm. If you do leave at 4pm, you will be viewed as a someone that just takes the easy way out.

“Wow, did you see Bill?, he took off at 4 today…what a slacker”. is something you might overhear.

Point being, just be awesome when you ARE at work, that’s the path to creating your own hours.

Also, did you know the best pie chart about being overweight already exists online?


Ummm yeah, pretty perfect.

So, yes, I’m fat. I get it. In an effort to get not fat, I signed up for the Tough Mudder in Chicago along with like 11 to 19 other actually “in shape” people. So I’m on that road right now. Impeding that journey currently is the fact that I am NOT graceful.

I literally fell down outside today.

I was up in Harbert, Michigan, at someone’s second home, which was 3 times larger than any of my/your first homes and/or apartments.

I was walking around back and the weather was not participating, and it was icy, and i’m a little bitch, and I FELL HARD.

I laughed because no one saw me and then I grimaced like that purple McDonald’s freak.

It hurt.

I’ve been in my bed for 7 hours, I left work early because I think I broke my tailbone because I’m really pathetic.

At the end of the day, 18 year olds say things like, “wow you are so gay because you are hurt”

25 year olds say things like, “wow, did you want me to hold your wife’s purse while you bitch out?”

30 year olds say things like, “wow, are you ok?”

You learn things as you get older 🙂

I’m really just a super big douche. It’s not fun.

What else….ummm OH!

I thought back to my team winning the “Slow Break” championship, I showed up and then performed like…



Ok so maybe I just thought that GIF was funny.

I have much more to talk about, and I actually will talk about that tomorrow.

The one thing that you should know is that even though I’ve been trying to avoid food/booze….I kinda drank today….but also ate NO food.

So 16 hours, some booze…no food…equals all of what you see before you. I think I did ok.