February 25th

Posted: February 25, 2013 in Comedy, Diet, exercise, Inspiration, Uncategorized, weight loss

I’m not really sure if you saw the Oscars last night but let me just tell you…the long hair look is OSCAR WORTHY:

Coke-wizards-at-the-Oscars

I’m basically an Oscar winner. Ask anyone.*

*Don’t ask anyone.

The best joke from the Oscars was when Seth Macfarlane was complimenting Daniel Day-Lewis by saying the last time an actor got that far inside Lincoln’s head, his name was John Wilkes Booth.

The whole crowd went silent, because screw you Hollywood.

That’s a funny joke. It’s been like 150 years…too soon? Really? That’s almost as stupid as when Chris Rock made fun of Jude Law and Sean Penn came to his defense and I watch waaaaay too much celebrity bullshit.

ANYWAY.

Last night I posted my Oscar picks for a few categories, and the only one I missed was Spielberg for Best Director, pretty sweet to get the others correct, however there were hardly that many upsets in my picks. I think I only picked 11 of 24 overall major categories, but I thought that was ok because I had only seen like 10% of the films up for awards. I cannot WAIT to see Argo. Ben Affleck is awesome. To be this young punk winning an Oscar for writing, cashing some paychecks, and then coming back to direct an Oscar winner. Boom. He’s winning.

So that was yesterday.

Today, the team I’m on for the “Slow Break” league won the league championship. I actually played a few more minutes than I thought I would, and let me tell you I was pretty freaking awesome.

Photo on 2-25-13 at 11.33 PM

Wait. I’m being told I was not pretty freaking awesome. It was actually pretty terrible. I feel like I did almost nothing right. My back was bothering me, but that’s no excuse for as many mental errors as I made. I don’t like thinking that I’m actually holding the team back from playing good basketball, but in my head that’s exactly what I felt. Old fatty strikes again. Shiiiiit.

On the PLUS side, we went to Buffalo Wild Wings tonight after the game to celebrate a little, and I drank a few beers but ate no food.

kramer-woah

I will repeat. I went to Buffalo Wild Wings, and had no food.

woah

Yeah, I had a mini party in my head.

I’ve actually only had a banana, a homemade turkey sandwich, and beer today. I think I’m going to go to bed leaving it at that. Wait, does booting black tar heroin count?

Acutally, I take that back, because once again, I live in LaPorte, and that shit is actually a thing now. Man, when I was in high school, my buddy got arrested for being drunk at school and EVERYONE was like…

holy

Except they didn’t duck.

Now the headlines in the paper (besides my teams winning every basketball championship ever) are all about heroin deaths and arrests and holy balls what the shit happened to LaPorte?

I’m just really, REALLY glad my parents raised me better than that, or I guess raised me at all.

That’s really all I’ve got tonight. This has been fun, why don’t you check back in tomorrow and see what else I have to say? What, like you’re SOOO busy.

Jerk.

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