September 12th

Posted: September 12, 2013 in Uncategorized


Nine days to go til the big show…til this willpower month is over…til I can have a cocktail…til a lot of things…

I have to pick up the pace on a few of these so I can get them done before this is all over. This weekend will be big for reading, juggling, and playing the trumpet. I’m sure the new puppy will just love that.

Speaking of…I introduced her to Stella, my parents’ 20 month old boxer pup…


They did not stand still for ANY length of time…Stella would absolutely just not leave Millie alone. It was like Millie was made of cocaine, and Stella was Chris.

Oh, Chris is a guy I went to college with that told me he did coke. I never saw him do it, but that’s the closest to cocaine use I’ve gotten. I blame my friends for not doing more cocaine, or doing cocaine and not telling me about it. What the shit man, you did coke but you can’t tell your good friend Ben about it? That’s kinda shady.

Today’s twitter joke:

Screen Shot 2013-09-12 at 10.00.05 PM

First estimate of the day today, and this happened:


It was early and I wasn’t paying close enough attention…and while that doesn’t look that bad, the tape lays flat, pinned under the deck and you can’t get it out without unspooling the tape completely. It happens but still…


I did get quite a lot accomplished throughout my day though, and after work and eating dinner with the parents, I headed over to my friend’s house to talk bidniss, life, and love…ok just the first two. BUT, their daughter gave me a HUG and I didn’t make her cry and I felt like not a creepy dude! I think it’s the weight loss. I look less like an ogre and more like normal guy (kinda) They are looking forward to the comedy show and I’m getting really excited for it too. I’m nervous and I want to be funny, but I don’t want to force it…YAY COMEDY NERVES.

Remind me to tell you people’s about something more tomorrow regarding comedy and why I should have tried it waaaaay before I actually did.

After visiting with my friends, Millie and I came home to find out what happens when Ben leaves appointment cards on his bed and leaves Millie alone for TWELVE SECONDS.


I think the knows it’s an appointment card for the vet and tried to destroy it so I’d forget to take her. Smart dog. Then sometimes Millie hits her head on the wall when she turns her head too fast. So I could be wrong about her intelligence. Maybe she’s really smart but has difficulty with spacial relationships. Like two astronauts getting divorced.


I can use that as a Twitter joke…brb.

Screen Shot 2013-09-12 at 10.27.16 PM

Thanks for coming with me on that glimpse into my brain. Go take a shower.


1. Blog about it daily. DONE!

2. 1600 Calories a day. DONE!

3. Only meals that have been cooked by someone not paid to cook. So like mom’s dinner yes, delivery pizza no. DONE!

4. Read 4 books. Done with Delivering Happiness…next up is my friend Erin’s recommendation: Let’s Pretend This Never Happened…then Teresa’s recommendation: The Art of Racing in the Rain…then Emily’s recommendation: Warmth of Other Suns

5. Work out once a day for more than 30 minutes. (this is going to be lenient, like walking is acceptable) DONE!

Millie time!

6. Tweet one joke a day (I will be posting this one to Twitter @kenbonowitz) DONE!

7. Drink only water. DONE!

8. 100% Abstinence (yes, that means no flogging the pope, or whatever awesome euphemism you use) DONE!

9. Do one RAOK a day! (this will probably be pretty lenient as well, but we’ll see) DONE!

10. Surprise someone everyday. (probably my favorite submission out of all of them) DONE!

11. Learn to juggle 4 things. YOU KNOW WHY – NOT DONE

12. Learn a song on the trumpet. YOU KNOW WHY AGAIN – NOT DONE

13. Spend zero dollars. DONE

14. Look like fat Thor (DONE!)

15. No texting. I will be available to call or Skype or email. But I won’t be texting. (I AM however SNAPCHATTING BECAUSE IT IS AWESOME)

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