So that turned out to be a lie.
I woke up at the breakfast table, in my workout clothes, like I was playing a game of “heads up 7-up” in elementary school, around 7:30ish?
I remember thinking “Millie is outside taking a girlie deuce, so I’ll just sit down at the table here and wait for her to come back inside.”
Dumbass.
However!
So instead I went to work and ate healthy and then I had plans to go see Gravity in 3D on the IMAX screen, so I cancelled those plans and went to the gym instead.
Highlights magazine references are soooo right now, you guys.
RAOK! (two smallish ones today)
1/2 Dropped off my paperwork to volunteer at a school with some little dude who needs a mentor. I learned a little about him, and I think we’re going to have a good time shooting the shit.
Note to self: probably don’t say “shooting the shit” when talking about mentoring a child.
2/2 Got out of my truck up in Michigan to check on an argument at the gas station. Turns out it was nothing, but that’s something I’m glad I looked into. Even though I’m a big softie, people that don’t know me could actually be intimidated, or even scared…
See?
Have fun not dreaming about that, ladies.
Here’s what I crammed in my face today:
Oops. I only ate 1,040 calories today. I’ll put in what I’m going to eat before bed here….
Ok there we go:
I don’t care, I love sandwiches. I love cottage cheese. I don’t like to cook. So this is what I end up with. I’m going to make myself dinner tomorrow night though so LOOK OUT!
Comedy intermission:
Here’s the Fuel band results:
Nailed it.
I flossed in the parking lot of the YMCA today. That is a thing I have now done.
Ben jokes on Twitter!
It’s 9:10. I’m going to attempt to sleep directly after I go eat that tasty sandwich.
1. Blog about it everyday: DONE
2. Wake up at 5 am on week days and 7am on weekends: DONE
3. Must physically step foot into the YMCA and workout every morning before work (P90X doesn’t count): F*** ME
4. Floss everyday (I just know I should do it more) DONE
5. Teach Millie to come to me. (she knows “sit”…and that’s all) DONE!
6. Do a Random Act Of Kindness (RAOK) everyday. DONE
7. Say “yes” to something once a week that I would normally have said “no” to. 2/7
8. 5 Videos for Charity
9. Weigh 242 pounds or under at the end of the 50 days or donate 1,000 dollars to the KKK
10. Eat one meal that has vegetables in it every week. Which means I will ingest 7 more vegetables than I would have normally. 1/7
The add ons:
11. Nothing to drink other than water (no booze, pop, beer, OJ, milk, Crystal Light…NADA) DONE
12. Publish one new joke on Twitter every day. DONE
13. Only eat food that has been purchased at the grocery store and/or prepared by someone not paid to do so. DONE
14. Keep an accurate calorie count of all food every day. DONE
15. No spending money on anything other than necessities (example…bills, groceries, clothes are ok) DONE
16. Full abstinence (because any willpower month that doesn’t include not touching your dick is just silly) DONE
17. Wear the Nike Fuel band every day and hit 3,000 fuel points everyday DONE
18. Finally learn a damn song on the trumpet.