homergoingon

1. Wake up by 5:30am every weekday and 7:30am every weekend day. Done. Do you know what hurts? All the things.

2. Eat breakfast everyday. Literally 3 scoops of cottage cheese because I almost forgot as I was heading out the door for work.

3. Cardio every morning before work, weekends before doing anything else.

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I basically put the incline between 3.0 and 5.5 and go REALLY slowly. At this point it’s just about creating the habit. I could give two big ole piles of poo about how many calories I burn or the distance or the time I spend doing it…just actually doing it is enough for me.

4. Drink only water, at least a gallon a day. You guys, I pee so much. Like, so much.

5. No fast food, and if I am at a sit down restaurant, order whatever the healthiest meat option is on the menu.

I met up with my friend Brady tonight to catch up (Hi Brady, you’re the best!) and we had an absolutely delightful time out at Portofino’s. I had the bruschetta and water and it was really good. I’m counting that as a vegetable because if you say tomato is a fruit you are unAmerican. I can prove it: From the Wikipedia article of Joseph McCarthy:

Screen Shot 2014-12-11 at 9

That is totally there and I absolutely did not take the time to change Joseph McCarthy’s Wikipedia page in order to make this joke.

Ok, I may have done exactly that. They deleted my edit literally within a minute. I felt bad. That’s a waste of their resources. I donated 3 dollars to Wikipedia so they don’t create a page for me that just says: Ben Konowitz is an American born asshole.

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Sorry Wikipedia, you’re great.

6. Cardio every night after work. I didn’t do this. I am still exhausted. I did get more exercise during the day today than normal with some extra estimates and volunteering a little, so I’m comfortable with this one not happening today.

7. Lift weights 3 days a week. I don’t have enough hours in the day. I was only able to do 50 push ups and 30 sit ups today but I have to count it. P.S. I don’t mean I didn’t have time to ONLY do 50 push ups and 30 sit ups…that’s physically all I could do. The pathetic is really dripping off me hardcore right now guys, but that’s okay…we’ll get there.

just start

8. Eat vegetables every night with a meal. Joe McCarthy!

9. Listen to/read one chapter of a book everyday. LOOK:

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I was able to do that while volunteering today.

10. Learn a new skill that I’ve never attempted before by working on it 10-30 minutes a day.

I went to the store today and couldn’t find crocheting stuff and didn’t have time to go another store, so I thought I’d spend a little time eating and watching YouTube videos. Did you know that crochet deals with yarn? I didn’t know that until today. Went my whole life on this planet not knowing that. I watched about 15 minutes worth of videos and I think I get the gist of it. I’m picking up the yarn and stuff tomorrow, so we’ll see how that goes.

11. Perform a random act of kindness every day.

I donated 3 dollars to Wikipedia. Whew, I totally forgot about this until I scrolled down to it. Let’s say that counts for today.

12. Blog every day (even if it’s just a quick update to document what I’ve done that day) 3 days strong.

13. Quit biting fingernails. SO MUCH EASIER TODAY.

14. Volunteer once a week. I spent two hours outside Wal-Mart today ringing the bell for the Salvation Army. Here’s a few things that I noticed.

  • People drive WAY too fast in front of Wal-Mart. THERE ARE KIDS RUNNING AROUND EVERYWHERE, SLOW THE F DOWN.
  • EVERY smoker throws down their butt right before they walk inside Wal-Mart. Just on the ground. If you see it every once in a while, you don’t really think too much about it. When you see 10-20 people in two hours right in front of you, it makes you want to say, “You’re a dick.”
  • The lack of eye contact is INSANE. People hugged the side of the door like my balls were out. They weren’t.  If you don’t want to donate, here’s how to do it like a pro. This one rednecky looking guy stared me down from the parking lot with a smile on his face, as he passed, he goes “Merry Christmas man, thanks so much!.” I nodded. When he left, he goes, “Thanks again!” with a big smile. I responded with, “No man, thank you!” But here’s the thing. HE DIDN’T DO ANYTHING. No donation at all, and I thanked the shit out of him.
    • I’m not a good bell ringer.
  • Most carts coming out of Wal-Mart are filled with soda/bottled water/junk food/appliances.

BUT:

  •  Little kids get money placed in their little gloved hand by their mom/dad/grandpa/whoever. They get lifted up and told “Go ahead, put the money in there.” Then I get to say, “Awww, thank you…you’re the best!” Then the little kid smiles SO big and their eyes are all wide and adorable. Those little kids more than make up for everything else. It’s damn magical.

15. Count all calories.

Screen Shot 2014-12-11 at 10.18.29 PM16. Organize one thing (area of the house, table, dresser, cabinet) in my house everyday. BOOM

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17 Spend 30 minutes every night planning the next day. This is officially just laying out clothes from now on…I didn’t think about how many 30 minute blocks I don’t have by the end of the day. Right now I have negative three 30 minute blocks left.

18. Floss every day. Still blood. But less blood. So, good?

19. Compliment someone everyday on something other than their looks.

I got to compliment so many people out their outfits/hats/attitudes today, it was great.

Last thing…when I get good at crochet…who wants an Alien facehugger!?

facehugger

 

Sweet dreams kids!

Comments
  1. Janet Nevills says:

    That’s so funny about the bell ringing and everyone avoiding you. One time, I did a health fair at Kroger. There I was with all my Jazzercise information for all the see! They had my table right by the end of the freezers where all the ice cream and frozen pizza can be found. I decided that day that it was my last health fair. It was like I had some contagious disease and they could smell it!!! I’ve never seen so many people avert my eyes, practically running the opposite direction, ramming the carts into other peoples ankles, scared that I may come after them. Every cart had more processed food than any person should be eating. Pop bottle hanging off the side to make room for the ice cream and pizzas. Don’t get me wrong, I eat pizza and ice cream (no pop though) but it was eye opening and kinda sad to see what 95% of people had in their carts.

  2. Brady says:

    Hi Ben! It was great seeing you the other night, and I’m so impressed with your willpower challenge.

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